I love Asians: Questions and Answers 2
February 27, 2010 | 25 Comments
This is part two of my questions and answers. I reposted it without the music, since people could not hear.
Duration : 0:7:2
If you like this post, be sure to subscribe to my RSS feed!Dating – How to Play it Cool!
February 27, 2010 | 6 Comments
I am often reminded of the story about Za-za Gabor. It was while she was lying by the pool at the Beverly Hills Hotel. She kept staring at a handsome sun-bronzed gent on the other side of the pool. After a time his curiosity got the better of him. As he approached her he said, `Madam, you keep looking in my direction, have we perhaps met before?’
Za-za said, `Dahling you look very much like my eighth husband’.
`Really, madam! Have you been married eight times?’
`No, dahling, only seven.’
Too often when single people embark on a first date, their anticipation is too intense. They treat the experience more like a marriage proposal than a first meeting with a relative stranger.
One woman arrived to meet her partner for the evening with a carefully prepared questionnaire. As he related the story to me later, he admitted he ensured his answers would not meet her criteria.
Another woman asks each would-be suitor, as soon as he rings, for the actual time of and his birth date. Men, in particular those who have no time for astrological beliefs find her queries quite off-putting. One fellow I know gives the stock reply to the question, `What is your star sign?’, `Sorry it’s not listed’.
The intense young man, who is earnestly looking for a wife to bear his children, makes up his mind within the first few minutes whether his escort is a suitable bride.
Those who sail straight in with questions such as: What are you looking for in a partner? What type of relationship are you seeking? What are your long term goals? are actually asking people to tell them their innermost secrets before they are even close friends; let alone trusted.
The workaholic and the fellow, who is insecure without an attachment, almost propose on the first evening. They probably had an eighty per cent chance of winning this woman if they had remembered the Italian expression, piano piano – take it slowly. Nothing frightens a woman off more quickly than an over-eager beaver.
There is nothing more disconcerting as a prospective partner who is too intense; too hell-bent on a serious relationship. The mind is channelled into the their urgent needs, losing sight of the perspective; forgetting that it takes two to tango and the partner must be both agreeable and suitable.
We know when a client who has recently met a suitable partner telephones to enquire what type of relationship he or she is seeking, that they are jumping the gun. We can feel the `wedding bells syndrome’ setting in after the first date.
We advise the intense clients to treat each new introduction as the beginning of a friendship and the opportunity of increasing their circle of friends. But alas our advice usually falls on deaf ears.
One fellow who had several meetings with a delightful but intense, to the extreme, young woman described to me how he felt when he decided not to pursue relationship. He said, `She remembered everything I said verbatim, even things I had forgotten, tying me down explicitly. The crunch came when I bade her goodbye one afternoon and made a detour on my way home. The phone was ringing as I walked in the door. Her first words to me were, ~It couldn’t have taken you that long to drive home~. I felt smothered, as though I was living in a gold fish bowl’. Which reminds me of the old saying, `There is no fury like a woman searching for a new lover’.
We all know how wonderful and exciting an intense relationship can be, especially when both partners are enjoying the intensity, but, `Hot love is soon cold’, or `Hot love, hasty vengeance’. But when only one partner is feeling the heat, the fire will never burn.
Treat each first date as the opportunity to make a new friend. Foster that friendship despite whether you feel chemistry or not. Form the habit of making friends, so that when Mr or Mrs Right comes along, you have developed an easy manner with the opposite sex and there will be no possibility of blowing it with over-enthusiasm.
Everyone has preconceived ideas developed over time from previous experiences. Should your prospective partner be still suffering the effects, from a hot and cold relationship or an over-intense partner, your attitude could well drive him or her away.
Remember, `A little wind kindles, much puts out the fire’.
For more information see: www.singles.net.au
Rosalind Baker
http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/dating-how-to-play-it-cool-742684.html
Dating Tips- How To Date Someone With Kids
February 27, 2010 | 3 Comments
Dating as it is, is a delicate issue which needs to be handled with care. It becomes even more complicated when there are children involved. Many people think twice about dating someone who has children and many singles with children are slightly nervous in starting a new relationship. Dating a person with children could end in a very long-lasting relationship. However you have to tread very cautiously, taking care in every step so that the children are not hurt. Surely the presence of children do complicate matters, but it does not mean that the relationship is doomed.
When you meet the children of the person you are dating is the most critical factor in the relationship. It is not essential to meet the children on the first date. in fact, it is not advisable, as the future of the relationship is still uncertain at this stage. It is important though for the person to admit that he or she has children but you must give each other enough time, before you meet the kids.
While it is true that the children play an important role in your partner’s life, you need a lot of time to think whether you want to be part of this scene and you want to take up the role of a parental figure in the children’s lives. If you have dated your partner long enough and are serious about continuing the relationship, then it is prudent to meet the partner’s children and get to know them.
While you don’t wish to be rushed and pushed into meeting the children during the early phase of your relationship, it also not too wise to postpone the meeting till its too late. For instance, if you decide to meet the children after you have taken a decision to marry the partner, meeting the children at this stage only throws them off gear. They will feel quite helpless at this stage, of meeting a new parent. Not only is meeting the children important, but the timing has to be perfect for doing so.
After meeting the children, it is equally important for you to recognize and appreciate their feelings. While you are dating their parent, it is important to start building a relationship with them as well. This is sometimes difficult, as the children often reject the person who is trying to take the position of their natural parent. If the biological parent is absent due to death or divorce, the children can get particularly hurtful.
The most important thing in this is to re-assure children that you are not encroaching in their lives and taking the position of their natural parent in any way. The type of role that you are likely to take on, is something you need to discuss with your partner and the children. This way they also get to express their concerns and gives you an opportunity to clearly demarcate areas of discipline and decision making. Children would like to feel belonged in this whole process as if they have a control over matters. Making them feel comfortable and re-assured is important for long term relationship building.
After establishing a rapport with the children it is time once again to concentrate on your own relationship with your partner. Once the children have been brought to the relationship, it does not mean that you lose sight of your own life with your partner. Try and bring as much balance as possible between yourself, your partner and the children. Its important to spend as much time as possible with your partner like you did before the children came on the scene. This will help your own relationship with your partner grow and mature.
Undoubtedly, maintaining a dating relationship with someone with children is often complicated but following these tips may ease the situation. Firstly, ensure that your relationship with your partner has reached a mature stage before you meet the children. Or else they may be in for a shock, if you disappear. When you meet the children, take things easy and appreciate their feelings and understand their apprehensions. Try an not move fast, take leads from them. Once you have met the children, make sure that you continue to spend time with your partner as previously done. Following these suggestions will definitely make it smooth to build a relationship with someone with children.
Jennifer Flanders
http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/dating-tips-how-to-date-someone-with-kids-86141.html
How to Get an Ex Back – Essential Questions to Ask
February 27, 2010 | 3 Comments
If you want to know how to get an ex back, the only person who can truly answer that question may very well be your ex. What? That may confuse you, but in many cases the only way to get an ex back is to figure out what they are thinking and establish healing communications that allow the relationship to move forward again. Since it can be quite difficult to get some people to open up with his sincere thoughts and feelings in order to reveal how to get an ex back, there are some questions that you can pose to them in a natural, off hand way that will give you some insight into their head.
Are you dating others?
Whether or not your ex is dating other people could tell you a lot about where their heart lies. Having a rebound relationship is not necessarily a sign they have moved on and no longer care about you, but if it turns into a long term relationship that is more serious it could spell trouble for you.
Want to go to a concert?
If your ex is willing to spend time with you and do things that you have enjoyed together in the past, then there is a very good chance they are still open to a future relationship with you. Simply inviting them to a concert you happen to have tickets for may seem innocent and friendly, but it gives you some very important insight into their emotional stance toward your relationship.
Will you call me if you need someone to talk to?
This is an excellent question to ask because it can show you how to get your ex back in the long run, in the case the short term seems unlikely to happen. Making yourself open when your ex needs someone close to them can be the big step that leads you two back together. Just the fact that your ex is open to talking to you still says a lot about their lingering feelings toward you. It means they at least still trust you and consider you worthy of their time.
You never want to sit an ex down and fire questions in an awkward manner. In order to learn how to get your ex back, you must pose them in a natural setting when emotions are calm.
An absolute must know for you- Do you want your ex back? Now listen carefully. There are a set of astonishingly powerful techniques which will get your ex begging you to date them again. These techniques are so strong that no matter how bad your situation was you are GUARANTEED to <a href=”http://ezinearticles.com/?How-to-Get-an-Ex-Back—Essential-Questions-to-Ask&id=1878209″>get your ex back</a>. So…don’t sit back and relax. These are the secrets you simply can not afford to miss at any cost. I strongly urge you to read everything very carefully on the next page. Follow this link- <a href=”http://www.getuexback.com” target=”_blank”>Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back Now!</a>
jerry cart
http://www.articlesbase.com/breakup-articles/how-to-get-an-ex-back-essential-questions-to-ask-725944.html
what tips do you guys have for a first date?
February 26, 2010 | 9 Comments
im going on a first date with my boyfriend. yes im gay. what tips do you have for the date? were going to a restaurant.
Just be yourself
Relax
Make eye contact
Don’t look bored
Smile
Don’t ry too hard
